TRACKLIST FOR MY NEW EP, AAA: FREE JAZZ INSPIRED BY SULLY SULLENBERGER, WHICH COMES OUT IN ELEVEN MINUTES (GIVE OR TAKE A DECADE):

• A PACK OF ALPACAS
• APOCADIX
• AMOR ALLUSION 

🐬🐬🐬🐬 Dolphins are one of the sea's greatest treasures. Do your best to respect the dolphins. Just by thinking about dolphins and saying out loud (maybe in a whisper, just to yourself), "dolphins are chill as fuck." That's just one thing you can do. I'm posting about dolphins on my blog, which is arguably a better thing to do, but it's not a competition. Thanks for checking out WWW.MyAMERI.CA and "Have a great day in the USA™." 🐬🐬🐬🐬

Where have all the CONTENT gone?

BAD JOB FILLING THIS CONTENT STREAM OVER THE WEEKEND. THAT'S ON ME, FOLKS (JEFF, IT'S ON JEFF). FARMS DON'T TAKE BREAKS AND THIS CONTENT FARM IS NO EXCEPTION. MY DEEPEST SINCERE APOLOGIES. A SORRY FROM THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA (AND MY HEART). YOU WILL GET BETTER CONTENT. TODAY. NOW. AND ALWAYS.

A sports bet to focus on that is not related to how Hillbilly Kingpin and Dobald Trumpf are gonna get down physically. (Yeah yeah I had the ATL +3 in my original picks post, but I liked that I could get -3 with EVEN odds––number has since moved to 2.5.)

Gamble on the Clinton/Trump debate embrace: hugs v smoochies

Whoa. Full-blown intercourse is +45000. Great value there.

IF YOU CAN TELL ME WHAT THIS VIDEO IS TRYING TO SAY, I WILL PAYPAL YOU A FLAGON OF RESPECT (ALTHOUGH I BET YOU ARE CYBER-HUMAN AND YOU WOULD BE JUST TRYING TO TRICK ME SO DON'T BOTHER)

Chill out, Matt Forte

and don't forget it, pencil pushers.

Klay Thompson NBA2K17 looking sharp!

• LATE TO THE GAME? ✔
• TOO OLD? ✔
• NOT FUNNY? ✔
• STRAPPED FOR TIME? ✔
• DAD ✔

Any word or phrase in the book, and I've heard it. But here's the thing: I'm building something here at MYAMERICA and I'd love if you'd be a part of it. The odds are stacked against me but I don't even give an F. Send me an email or join the mailing list, and we can work it out. I will pay 'ground-floor champions' of this blog upwards of 11¢ a year. I don't care.

P R E A C H

William L. says what we're all thinking. I never DON'T have sex (with cops, male AND female) in any other place. It's the bathroom or bust for me. And with these hemoroids sitting is basically an afterthought for anything. Please respect my rights and read my blog. Thank you.

i feel a lil embarrassed listening to the 'rap part' in the new dirty projectors jam but i also really lyke it ?

Friday Night Special™

#FREE MONEY +775 PARLAY. FROM YOUR FRIEND JEFF.

Why Humans Like Rooftop Bars/Restaurants: An Exposè

Toledo, O.H.– Picture this: You. A roof. A glass of your favorite adult beverage ... that's when the pterodactyls are most likely to attack. Yet time and time and time and time and time again we find ourselves in this very scenario. Sad.

[YOU HAVE REACHED YOUR FREE ARTICLE LIMIT THIS MONTH • SUBSCRIBE TO MYAMERICA+ TO KEEP READING FOR JUST $79.99 A DAY]

sdasdp

SO I DECIDED TO 'MAN UP' AND GO THRU W/ WATCHING THE SHRIMP ON THE BARBIE (FIRST 40 MINUTES THIS MORNING) AND I AM SO HAPPY I DID. IT MIGHT BE ONE OF THE GREATEST 100 MOVIES EVER. I WILL GENERATE MORE CONTENT ON THIS EXPERIENCE/FILM LATER. SO SO SO SO GOOD.

OREGON DUCKS FINALLY ACHIEVED PEAK UNIFORM DESIGN

That's it, folks. They Ducks finally did it. The uniform experiment must end. And it must end NOW. My take:

For the past 75-100 years or something like that, the Oregon U football squad has been literally wearing a different uniform design for every single game they've played. This recruiting gimmick/schtick has been fruitful. The Ducks have been the class of the Pac (12). But with the announcement and release that this weekend's uniform is going to look like an actual duck (see left) the experiment needs to end. These are pretty much the coolest uniforms ever. Short of gluing some actual feathers to them I'm not sure how they could be improved. I love them. Do all your loyal fans a favor, OU, and stick with the duck style. #DuckStyle4Life

This might be the best photograph I've ever taken.

JAPAN

hi how is goin ? i think i am gonna go for a soul-searchin' jog ... i know i said i was gonna watch this movie but i just can't do it today, or... any day ? i'm sorry :-(

AN IDEA:

for: a band name / band concept

what the heck you got in mind, Jeff: (hear me out) The Dave SlapsYou Band

go on: just a band fronted by a guy/guys named Dave who go around slapping audience members (a real fun time for the whole family)

A+ GOLD FTW 100

nASk

nasdasd

nasdaksd

nasd

NASdUll

Quality smirk on this guy. Potential under-the-radar RB I'm eyeing.

Gimme a "C-O-N-T-E-N-T

… wut does that spell? PENGUIN QUEEN 2016!"

---

CONTENT POST ID: G0007386229_10
POSTED: 11:30:15 AM EST
FROM: PPHQ Philly
GENERAL DESCRIP: Good picture & words

Watching this movie today on the gym stairmaster. Can't wait.

PRESS RELEASE. Missouri, Idaho, Worldwide, USA. So puhleased to announce the debut of two new programs Live from PPHQ (which I will record on my phone with Facebook Live––update:DELETED) and Jeffkkast Live (which I will record on my knockoff iRulu tablet with Ustream). The titles of these shows are basically meaningless trash.

I shoulda called the iPhone "Jeffkkast Live" because I will probably only record with the tablet one in my basement so "Live from PPHQ" makes more sense? Who the F knows. This is the beginning of the end but at least it's the beginning. Everything is meaningless. See you on the feeds.

Thinkman

T I M E _ 2 _ G E T _ 2 _ W U R K _ ⏳ _T I M E _ 2 _ G E T _ 2 _ W U R K _ ⏳_ T I M E _ 2 _ G E T _ 2 _ W U R K _ ⏳ _T I M E _ 2 _ G E T _ 2 _ W U R K _ ⏳_ T I M E _ 2 _ G E T _ 2 _ W U R K _ ⏳ _T I M E _ 2 _ G E T _ 2 _ W U R K _ ⏳_ T I M E _ 2 _ G E T _ 2 _ W U R K _ ⏳ _T I M E _ 2 _ G E T _ 2 _ W U R K _ ⏳_ T I M E _ 2 _ G E T _ 2 _ W U R K _ ⏳ _T I M E _ 2 _ G E T _ 2 _ W U R K _ ⏳_ ?

Big shout out to Eddie Royal who is an avid reader of this blog. Great GTPRTD! (garbage time punt return TD) Got me THA OVAH!!! More like Eddie King if you ask me. ("royal" just doesn't cut it)

WECLOME 2 HELLL

Niulal

Nualld

C O N T E N T (Ô) K I L L E R

K I S S Y – K I S S Y ~I N~ T H E ~C O N T E N T~ P A T C H

Just got back from Raleigh

and I took a 2+ hour nap. Maybe the longest nap I've taken in 3+ years? Debating how hard I should crush this coming week. Leaning towards FULL ANNIHILATION. For starters, I put on another 17.5 lbs so there's no where to go but up in the health & fitness dept. Secondly, I got so many ideas juices flowing that my shit is like literally a river and the river is flooding (call FEMA, bitches). Thirdly, I don't even need a third point. Lemme just watch MNF and do one last carb binge in peace. L8er.

I posted this shit on twitter but I'm posting again here too whatever I'm on the #WentzWagon I guess. Final score: Chicago 27-24.

ASCoo

Because I had SHIT luck last Saturday, I am going to refrain from gambling on the college ball this weekend. My only wager is a modest one on the +270 Temple moneyline as I loathe Penn St. and would love to see my Philly boys beat them on JoePa day.

ASDASDSADAKD

A VOTE 4 TRUMP IS A VOTE 4 LŸFE

Hoping for a homerun tonight. I'll have some college plays later on.

JASDjokesonehy

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