I found someone's flip-flop in Princeton NJ. Email me if you are missing a flip-flop.

http://pic.twitter.com/b2DGwdC7ia — ø (@0tterboy) December 12, 2016

Gearing up in anticipation for something else that is entirely not this

new years resolution: take more photos of my dog

I'm super-psyched to announce the opening of my new tattoo parlor, SINISTER INK. This is our official logo. We are still working on getting a cheap space to rent but for now if you want a tattoo just get a pen and draw one yourself! (If it comes off in the shower, etc., just draw another one!)

… hate that I love the Fred Armisen KFC songs so much …

In 2017, I am going to [attempt to?] make daily videos, which will eventually be featured on lifecast.info, via my phone using the app Splice. I will take, edit and upload the videos at the end of the day using nothing but my phone, my hands, my brain and the internet. This is part of a greater realization/challenge that computers are becoming obsolete and we will soon be literally doing everything we do on computers exclusively on our phones. The biggest roadblock here is of course the iPhone storage issues, which I feel like I've complained about ad nauseam.

It's weird to me that any professional athlete would actually drink "Sprite®" and not just shill for it in commercials etc. (I'm kind of a hypocrite, though. I do enjoy a Diet Soda beverage on occasion; maybe once or twice a month. And those are pretty much equally trash.)

Forget "voter fraud"

WHAT ABOUT: Voter frappuccino ?

I'm in charge of my company's (day job y'all) Twitter account and there are certainly worse tasks in this world but jesus christ all of the Trump Thoughts™ I need to look at/consider. I've been able to successfully purge all Trump-related news / politics in general from my life, except for two arenas. This Twitter account and the stupid TVs at my gym, half of which are on 24-hour cable news channels which cover Trump roughly 98% of the time. I watch movies at the gym but these TVs are giant, looming in pretty much everyone's sightline (it's a Planet Fitness, if that reference works for you––I believe all of their gyms are set up the same way). My previous gym was $30 more a month but only had individual TVs on each machine. Starting to think the extra $360/year was worth it to save me from this hellacious distraction.

Here's an email I just wrote to my brother

re my thoughts on last night's 10-7 Giants victory over the Cowboys.