This is the bench which I sat on when I recorded my now viral podcast, Movie Review 39: The Lobster.

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Hearing a lotta sighs out of my co-workers' moufs. Let's tighten up ship, guys!

As mentioned, I'm no political junkie. But I do find it hilarious that all the people Trump beat had to bow down and kiss the ring and speak on his behalf. What a weird shame-mongering tradition. Imagine if sports losers had to do this? If the Golden State Warriors had to fly into Cleveland and speak first at the championship parade rally about how awesome the Cavs are, how wacky right? It's so weird to me!

You know what would be an interesting topping/addition to a salad, or maybe even a taco or something? Plum skins. You ever notice how much of the beautiful tartness of a plum is in the skin? Well just peel some plums, chop 'em up, maybe even try frying them (?), and add them to a dish. I really need to open my own fancy restaurant. What am I doing with my life.

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I wrote a book yesterday that is actually just an animated gif. It is a chapbook because it is for chaps, but also for ladies. It is called Popcorn Emoji: The Book, but its full title is actually Popcorn Emoji Beats Popcorn Shrimp Emoji But Not Because It Is Better Emoji: Life Is Unfair (Great Book That Is A Gif). You can learn more about this book here (link coming soon).

# STEPS I'VE TAKEN JUNE→NOW

JUNE

1 5173
2 5101
3 8352
4 12697
5 5828
6 2306
7 10968
8 5626
9 11409
10 12728
11 3710
12 10183
13 11069
14 12228
15 7379
16 10730
17 10716
18 12421
19 5085
20 1795
21 4564
22 11720
23 8873
24 7828
25 8402
26 7273
27 2970
28 15252
29 9301
30 6609

JULY

1 13249
2 15731
3 15462
4 8452
5 20032
6 11052
7 15165
8 11269
9 17196
10 6354
11 10657
12 4093
13 9812
14 9810
15 13113
16 11873
17 7813
18 10175
19 8675
20 4399
21 9456
22 5891
23 6939
24 4046

I'm just an honest boy who loves to shoot some hoops at the basketball ring.

If I were a politician I would just play elevator and/or hold music as bumpers/walk-on tracks. This would establish my brand as _____, whilst also assuring no band/artist would get all cranky pants about it. (See this content for further context thank you.)

NOBLE
COLON
CLEANSE 

An album called, Image Editor (brought to you by Sam Hinkie's "The Process" ©2013-2016)

Yo, so I will be posting a new Knicks-centric podcast (~11 min. long) shortly, but wanted to pepper said content with an anecdote, potentially a harbinger of good things to come in NYK Land. Here goes: A few days after the D-Rose trade, my family took a short a trip to AC (Atlantic City, NJ) and while news of that city's demise has (probably?) been exaggerated, it's certainly no thriving metropolis. But anyway, what gigantic ad/billboard is still front and center on top of a sneaker store on the corner of the popular outlet shopping area? You guessed it. Young Derrick Rose, former MVP and centerpiece of an Adidas campaign of yesteryear. The ad is faded, and sad if considered in an alternate reality where D-Rose is not currently a New York Knick, but I am Mr. Sunshine & Roses, and I took this is as a 'SIGN' man. Some enterprising street hooligan needs to graffiti that biatch with some blue and orange is what I'm thinking. Hell yea.

UPDATE: Billboard is on the corner of Arctic/Arkansas, in case you were wondering, and why the heck wouldn't you be. all in for d rose, y'all. I'm pretty sure the lights are still on at the Adidas outlet store.

Now?

Saw The Lobster last night and really loved it (audio podcast review forthcoming––watchout!). I vaguely knew the premise going in, but the movie was vastly different than anything I could've imagined (I was thinking 'twee' given the nature of the plot, and it couldn't have been less so). I highly recommend this movie. You probably have to be in the right headspace but don't ask me to explain that headspace for fear I might out myself as being unwell. Whoops.

Many people have framed pictures of me hanging on their walls (not just on mantles, side tables and other places of inferior esteem). Anyone'll tell you this.

On the human condition and other matters.

MASDAMll

Humans born on 9/11 all gonna be having sex pretty soon. People forget that.