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   K E Y:  ✄= art ✎= lit ♪= music ✪= video;  = highly recommended content

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Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Aแดแด‡ส€ษชแด„แด€ Cแด€ษด Bแด‡แด„แดแดแด‡ Wแด‡แด€สŸแด›สœส
NEW RECORD FROM JACK JAPAN, FORTHCOMING VIA P.P. REX 〄. TO PRE-ORDER, WAVE YOUR HANDS AROUND UNTIL YOU MAIM A BIRD. TEACH THE BIRD SIGN LANGUAGE. THEN THE BIRD WILL SIGN YOU THE URL WHERE YOU CAN DO A PRE-ORDER.
⇰⻏ook㇋

Monday, February 27, 2017

wanna go to TRUMP TOWER and sing a seven-hour version of my song "I'm Just a Tourist (Don't Worry 'bout Me)" by I haven't written a song called "I'm Just a Tourist (Don't Worry 'bout Me)"

Might not be the best movie to watch at the gym tonight…

The Baby of Mรขcon (1993) by Peter Greenaway looks like a hoot.

If I Do ๐•, Then ๐• Means I've Already Died

Kmart Tarps have been one of the most consistent and prolific bands under The Pizza Puppies umbrella and it's only the audience getting wet (with sound). That's why I was pleased as a spiked punch when I got this animatronic gif in the electronic mail. Kmart Bloody Kmart is poised to be their masterwork and it's due out on P.P. Rex in late 2029. Can't wait!

๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‚๐Ÿผ

pure anonymous panda
  -- do u want a hit ?
My ๐Ÿ‘Ÿ (FOOT) hurts ๐Ÿ˜‚
 

c r i p p l i n g l y

๐Ÿ

Sunday, February 26, 2017

๐Ÿ‘‘ Nan King Cole Massacre ๐Ÿ‘‘

" M a k i n g a S c e n e (in Walgreens)"

In late January, Vernon Howl (ex-@vernonhowl) got into a Twitter conversation with a Weird Al fanatic

The esteemed Pizza Puppies user just released an a cappella record available for free here.
Thinking about becoming a performance artists FYI

Saturday, February 25, 2017

Not sure if this guy bought enough ๐Ÿบ

This is probably the coolest photo I've ever taken. It's def the coolest photo of my dog. Full size here.

Been just casually posting a lot of hot fake album covers all willy-nilly like when I shoulda been adding them to this jam. Oh well.

Friday, February 24, 2017

sea in colour

And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever And Ever 

Thursday, February 23, 2017

Yo, wanna go on a Cialis Binge with me ??


This is a hot handle… I be jeal-jeal.



Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Arukka Zuz?

How I'm living.

The Crocodile Hunter would have been 55 years old today

Tuesday, February 21, 2017

BRANDZ is live.
SEEMINGLY NO AMT. OF SUGAR GONNA MAKE ME SMILE TODAY • MIGHT HAVE TO GO LAY IN A DITCH AND FETCH SOME SUNLIGHT
KISSY
KISSY
in the
PORNO
MORGUE

Monday, February 20, 2017

this one goes out to that special someone in the world who won't drink Arizona 99¢ cuz it's not american enough

Sunday, February 19, 2017

GAS ⛽️ GIANT ๐ŸŽ

NC Trout

Wherein the klutz throws around more useless, festering thoughts. . .

Saturday, February 18, 2017

My face is definitely plastered on too many album covers lol.

Friday, February 17, 2017

Princeton hoops really crushing it this year. Their last loss was Dec. 20th. 9-0 in the Ivy.
AND THAT WAS YOUR UNIVERSITY OF PRINCETON SPORTS UPDATE.

๐Ÿฃ

Just a fun selfie

๐Ÿฃ

Every super lo-fi video I take with my Kindle Fire it says the date created was NYE 1969.
ATTN: This is the greatest YouTube video ever posted. Please watch it and share it with your friends & family #NotFakeNews.

If I ever record an album in Prague there's a ๐Ÿ’ฏ% chance I'm going to name it Prague Rock

Thursday, February 16, 2017

๐Ÿฃ

๐Ÿฃ

DADS: Both new & old


Wednesday, February 15, 2017

A WEEK AGO TODAY I RAN 14 MILES AND NOW I CAN BARELY MOVE AND YOU CAN TOO
Just discovered Mukbang and now I want to die...

SkiKyd is the evil twin brother of the pseudonym SkyKid (if you're keeping score at home)




๐Ÿฃ

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

I don't think I've actually ever seen any "fake news" tbh. Like, what are we dealing with here, "President Obama Got His Dick Bit Off by a Raccoon?" How fake is this fake news, is what I'm asking. Have I clicked on it and not known it (like stepping in a trace amount of ๐Ÿ’ฉ?).

My personal theory on the matter is that the entire concept is a Russian/Trump misdirect aimed at causing general confusion and uncertainty among the masses. See the Adam Curtis doc HyperNormalisation for more on the potential of this theory.

But seriously, in the meantime, if anyone could forward me a link to an actual, confirmed bit of fake news, I'd appreciate it.

Rejection drugs

๐Ÿˆด๐Ÿˆด๐Ÿˆด๐Ÿˆด

ha p p y val & tynez _ day

Monday, February 13, 2017

『 I don't have anything good to say
             but I'm gonna say it anyway... 』

+ THE MAID MADE A MAYO MESS (AGAIN) +

Somewhat troubled by my recent frequently used emojis tbh.

GET READY


I just unearthed a new DIY invention. I was trying to make a homemade stylus for drawing on my macbook's trackpad, and wasn't having a ton of luck. Then I noticed the grapefruit rind sitting on my desk. I picked up a piece and voila! The damn thing worked as skin-like texture and was super-responsive. Here is the first drawing I made just by using a still kinda moist sliver to draw with my fingers:


Enter, PHASE 2: Now I just need to build a stylus using a piece of grapefruit rind attached to the end of a pen or something. This idea is gonna be gold. I'm gonna make a YouTube video about it tomorrow and it's gonna get at least 45,000 views over the next five years because––as you can see from the screengrab at the top of this post––I'm clearly the first person to have this kooky idea.

just googled, "homemade macbook stylus"

j e a l - j e a l ? ?
My biggest regret of the Third Act of today's long, rambling Drive-Time™ episode of my podcast was that I didn't address the Lil Yachty/Carly Rae Jepsen Target commercial. It's hard to begrudge anyone for getting paid to do something, and I actually thought the song was as good as any 2017 cover of "It Takes Two" could possible hope to be, B U T… fuck that shit, and fuck Target. That was all that I could think about watching that bludgeoning salute to capitalism last night. My 2¢ folks.

Sunday, February 12, 2017

S/O to MC Abe Lincoln, who would have been 209 years old today if that jerk J Dubs B didn't kill him.

I've said it before and I'll say it again …

I can basically always do without the saxophone ๐ŸŽท — the only exception being "Sex Bomb" by Flipper. That's all. Thank you.


My name is Emu Walker

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Also got some dough on the clip ML +120.


Even as he was walking across america barefoot, Mark Baumer would occasionally post writing prompts on his website. These were some of my favorite writing of his. I'm currently going through them to get an inspired for ideas 
I'm a 47 year old guy who's pretty down to earth with a sick sense of humor, I have many interests from hunting, fishing, old classic Mopar cars and Dodge diesel trucks, I like racing drag racing being my favorite. I also like to be adventurous and like traveling when I can. I'm a fan of metal, and red dirt country music. I follow a paleo lifestyle, I like hiking and lifting weights, crossfit is something I want to get more involved in also. This blog is a bit of my personality, I am keeping this on the cleaner side. I am into romance and I do have a freaky side of my life also that I don't post on here. I am a spiritual person and enjoy living a life in sobriety, because I did a lot of wreckage in my past and life today is way better than it was years ago. Anyway I hope you all enjoy my blog and thanks to those of you who do follow me. If there's anything you want to know or have any questions feel free to ask. [Source.]

You Look Absolutely

Friday, February 10, 2017

CURRENTLY, MY TWO SPIRIT ANIMALS ARE THE FRIED SHRIMP EMOJI ๐Ÿค AND THE SAIGA ANTELOPE

much love to the red-tailed hawk but you have been relegated until the end of winter at least

On the left you'll see how I'm organizing my writing projects on my iPhone using the native Notes app. My daily goal is 5-10K words and, although I come up way short all the time, I still feel it's a solid mark for me to try and hit. On the right is my Google Drive folder where I back up everything / keep finished projects. When a project is done I put an avocado emoji (๐Ÿฅ‘) in the title field. Thanks for reading this website.
really wanna trademark (™) the phrase "Gob bless y'all, shalomheadz" or even just work on branding SHALOMHEADZ as a slogan/movement/underground rap squad … please wish me luck, shalmonheadz

Oh, bing

God love ya, bing. Keep trying.

ⓝแนŒⓉ

I had a random thought; it was absurdist/nonsensical, and I wanted to post it right here. But then I forgot it. Almost as immediately as it came to me haha, now 'tis gone. Forever, perhaps.

I can't quit u

Despite my (relative) lack of proficiency in the arena, I continue to gamble on sports nearly every chance I get, which is to say whenever I want, given the (not so relative) lack of constraints of the www. Anyway, I've been reduced to picking sides on what I choose to believe are cosmic whims. For example, I just listened to and enjoyed this new Danny Brown project so whoever the hell "D Brown" is in the above tennis contest, well, he is whom I'm backing (this betrayal of PAIRE who did his part for me yesterday is duly noted).

Of course, I didn't actually bet on Mr. D Brown at all in the two separate wagers posted above, now did I? But they are both in the spirit of betting on him and, as standalone investments, they both offer better payouts than simply betting on him to the win the match straight up. I am putting my cash on the spirit of the underdog to make this a thrilling (read: long) tennis contest, you see. But as my luck would have it D will surely win in straight sets: 6-3, 7-6 … mon dieu, l'horreur

Thursday, February 9, 2017

LiVES†HE†iC: CANCELED!


I'm sad to say that my live internet talk show (?) has been canceled. But per an exclusive agreement with Zuck, I reserve the right to utilize the URL whenever I please, and will probably air some really awesome shit on it so follow it I guess.

What it's like watching a tennis match unfold live on Google.com

I couldn't find a stream so I have been reduced to watching this "live" score via google to see if my boy Paire could break serve in the first set's third game. SPOILER: He did not.


Here's a lil upcoming tennis ball (๐ŸŽพ) wager. Both matches are set to start at the top of the hour (10AM EST), in separate ATP events. The first of which features my boy Paire playing in his home country of France. He is 0-1 against his opponent but that match was a 5-set affair back in 2010. The bottom draw features my boy Seppi, an Italian, trying to go 3/3 head-to-head vs his opponent in a tournament called "Sofia" in Bulgaria. I love betting on weird things in the morning.