In correspondence with Book #41 of the www.WeeklyBooks.net Web-Site. I should probably say no more about it here, but there are liner notes I was instructed to add. (Please note: this is an official "Just Jeff" released under the monicker of fake band Iguanas Ascend" posing as an artist named "BabeMagnet69" — it was EXECUTIVE PRODUCED by Vernon Howl. I know that's too confusing, but that is also canon and canon is confusing sometimes.
This was conjured from the deep within the computer who lent itself to a steak consumed raw by the dog who went rabid and bit the hand of the software designer who dared conjure from the deep within…
You can read the lyrics for these songs if you wish...
1 “Fruit”
He gets on with life as a solicitor,
He's an intelligent kinda chap.
He likes breeding guppies and swimming.
He likes to contemplate fruit.
But when he starts to daydream,
His mind turns straight to chocolate.
Oh oh oh!
He likes to use words like 'twizzle' and 'righteo.'
He likes to use words about fruit.
But when he stops his talking,
His mind turns straight to chocolate.
Oh oh oh!
He likes to hang out with Mike and Laura.
But when left alone,
His mind turns straight to chocolate.
Oh oh oh!
He hates dead fish and washing dishes.
But he just thinks back to chocolate,
And he's happy once again.
Oh oh oh!
2 “Trainers”
She gets on with life as a corporate banker,
She's a rude kinda gal.
She likes train spotting on Sundays,
She likes listening to music in the week.
She likes to contemplate trainers.
But when she starts to daydream,
Her mind turns straight to stiletto boots.
Oh oh oh!
Does she love stiletto boots more than trainers?
Does she love stiletto boots more than trainers?
She likes to use words like 'chortle,'
She likes to use words like 'disgusting.'
She likes to use words about trainers.
But when she stops her talking,
Her mind turns straight to stiletto boots.
Oh oh oh!
Does she love stiletto boots more than trainers?
Does she love stiletto boots more than trainers?
She likes to hang out with Matt,
She likes to kick back with Rich,
But when left alone,
Her mind turns straight to stiletto boots.
Oh oh oh!
Does she love stiletto boots more than trainers?
Does she love stiletto boots more than trainers?
She's not too fond of ants,
She really hates teenyboppers,
But she just thinks back to stiletto boots,
And she's happy once again.
3 “A Jolly Kinda Princess”
They get on with life as a princess,
They're a jolly kinda type.
They like listening to music and frying ants.
They like to contemplate girls.
But when they start to daydream,
Their mind turns straight to boys.
Shala la la la la la!
Do they love boys more than girls?
Do they love boys more than girls?
They like to use words like 'monkey' and 'magic.'
They like to use words about girls.
But when they stop their talking,
Their mind turns straight to boys.
Shala la la la la la!
Do they love boys more than girls?
Do they love boys more than girls?
They like to hang out with Rich and Tom.
But when left alone,
Their mind turns straight to boys.
Shala la la la la la!
Do they love boys more than girls?
Do they love boys more than girls?
They hate wasp nests and finding dead birds.
But they just think back to boys,
And they're happy once again.
Shala la la la la la!
4 “A Brave Kinda Princess”
They get on with life as a princess,
They're a brave kinda type.
They like swimming on Sundays,
They like playing computer games in the week.
They like to contemplate blondes.
But when they start to daydream,
Their mind turns straight to brunettes.
Shoop-shoop!
Sometimes I look at them and I look into their eyes,
I notice the way they think about brunettes with a smile,
Curved lips they just can't disguise.
But they think it's blondes making their life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for them to decide which they love more?
Blondes or...
Brunettes?
They like to use words like 'pickle,'
They like to use words like 'macho.'
They like to use words about blondes.
But when they stop their talking,
Their mind turns straight to brunettes.
Shoop-shoop!
Sometimes I look at them and I look into their eyes,
I notice the way they think about brunettes with a smile,
Curved lips they just can't disguise.
But they think it's blondes making their life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for them to decide which they love more?
Blondes or...
Brunettes?
They like to hang out with Katy,
They like to kick back with Justin,
But when left alone,
Their mind turns straight to brunettes.
Shoop-shoop!
Sometimes I look at them and I look into their eyes,
I notice the way they think about brunettes with a smile,
Curved lips they just can't disguise.
But they think it's blondes making their life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for them to decide which they love more?
Blondes or...
Brunettes?
They're not too fond of ants,
They really hate dead fish,
But they just think back to brunettes,
And they're happy once again.
Shoop-shoop!
5 “A Fragrant Kinda Consultant”
You get on with life as a consultant,
You're a fragrant kinda person.
You like walking the dog and playing golf.
You like to contemplate men.
But when you start to daydream,
Your mind turns straight to women.
Oh oh oh!
You like to use words like 'splendid' and 'chortle.'
You like to use words about men.
But when you stop your talking,
Your mind turns straight to women.
Oh oh oh!
You like to hang out with Matt and Chris.
But when left alone,
Your mind turns straight to women.
Oh oh oh!
You hate burnt on cheese and headless chickens.
But you just think back to women,
And you're happy once again.
Oh oh oh!
6 “How much do they love vodka?”
They get on with life as a solicitor,
They're a jolly kinda type.
They like playing computer games on Sundays,
They like playing computer games in the week.
They like to contemplate orange juice.
But when they start to daydream,
Their mind turns straight to vodka.
Shala la la la la la!
Do they love vodka more than orange juice?
Do they love vodka more than orange juice?
They like to use words like 'muppet,'
They like to use words like 'poo.'
They like to use words about orange juice.
But when they stop their talking,
Their mind turns straight to vodka.
Shala la la la la la!
Do they love vodka more than orange juice?
Do they love vodka more than orange juice?
They like to hang out with Mike,
They like to kick back with Emily,
But when left alone,
Their mind turns straight to vodka.
Shala la la la la la!
Do they love vodka more than orange juice?
Do they love vodka more than orange juice?
They're not too fond of burnt on cheese,
They really hate washing dishes,
But they just think back to vodka,
And they're happy once again.
7 “How much does he love women?”
He gets on with life as a politician,
He's an intelligent kinda chap.
He likes baking cakes on Sundays,
He likes playing football in the week.
He likes to contemplate men.
But when he starts to daydream,
His mind turns straight to women.
Shoop-shoop!
Sometimes I look at him and I look into his eyes,
I notice the way he thinks about women with a smile,
Curved lips he just can't disguise.
But he thinks it's men making his life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for him to decide which he loves more?
Men or...
Women?
He likes to use words like 'victory,'
He likes to use words like 'fortified.'
He likes to use words about men.
But when he stops his talking,
His mind turns straight to women.
Shoop-shoop!
Sometimes I look at him and I look into his eyes,
I notice the way he thinks about women with a smile,
Curved lips he just can't disguise.
But he thinks it's men making his life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for him to decide which he loves more?
Men or...
Women?
He likes to hang out with Andy,
He likes to kick back with Will,
But when left alone,
His mind turns straight to women.
Shoop-shoop!
Sometimes I look at him and I look into his eyes,
I notice the way he thinks about women with a smile,
Curved lips he just can't disguise.
But he thinks it's men making his life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for him to decide which he loves more?
Men or...
Women?
He's not too fond of people putting DVDs back in the wrong boxes,
He really hates smelly farms,
But he just thinks back to women,
And he's happy once again.
Shoop-shoop!
