Have you ever caught yourself looking at a photo of an ape and wondering, "hmm, I wonder what an EXPERT would rate this ape on a scale of 1 to 10?" Well, wonder no longer, pal! Pizza Puppies recording artists, Boomerang Sleep––in association with the release of their EP, The Average Ape––are offering professional grades on all ape jpegs found on the internet. If you find a picture of an ape or apes on the internet and you press the button to buy a rating for said ape image for just $1.37, within 3-7 business days, Boomerang Sleep will email you back a certificate featuring said '1 out of 10' rating of said ape. PLEASE READ THE NEXT PART OF THIS OFFER CAREFULLY! Only ape pictures will be rated! If you send a picture of a monkey, it WILL NOT BE RATED! NO MONKEYS! AND NO REFUNDS IF YOU SEND US A MONKEY PICTURE EITHER! If you don't know the difference between an ape and a monkey then please go away. Thank you. (PS. This is a limited run of 17,000 ratings.)
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