May 30, 2017 at 10:43AM

My new Facebook avatar is a video of a piece of poop sitting in a urinal.

NBD just a 🍺 with a rubber glove on it @ a ⚾️ game

The Jeffkkast, a podcast I apparently do (?), is now available via the STITCHER website/app. I added it to this space on the web because Stitcher is in fact what I primarily use to digest (ingest?) pods. So it seemed right to add it on this platform. OK THATS ALL BYE. Updake.NoMore

an album called Male Pattern Badness

If I were the type of people who replied to tweets, I would've wrote, "finally... a goatee for MEN" (something like that).

adding to my expereince last night watching the TWIN PEAKS RETURN PARTS 1&2:

  • my dad was sleeping sitting straight up on the couch in the adjacent room
    (could hear his breathing throughout)
  • my parents dog who is old and has these weird open sores was sleeping near
    me and the stink her sores emit is truly something

I am the boy without subplot, moving through this world of sludge a vessel better suited for carrying pet birds to and from the pet bird morgue to I.D. their dead pet bird counterparts. The horrific accidents they endure are not so different than our every moment. I am a parrot and I was never the boy.

My rap name would be D-Vice

May 19, 2017 at 10:47AM

I'm breathing rn

Look at this sign why is it in a cage ?? Set the cage free is what I say folks ;; Set it ALL THE WAY free !!

T i m e • i n • V e r s e

HAHAHA JUST 8 ?!?!?!

Eight different filters will be available starting today, including a few different crowns, ones that make a person look like a koala or a rabbit, and another that sends math equations spinning around your head.

May 16, 2017 at 09:16AM

Always the 💨 windshield, never the 🐜 bug

A 🍕 FOR DOGS?

Sure thing, howza'bout uno large "" P u p p e r o n i "" pizza pie coming up, lol. Just a gag-post, folks. The actual good content is coming soon I promise.

Next up: fannypack phase™